Let’s Face It: Michelle Obama Is a Feminist Cop Out

A debate has erupted over whether the First Lady is hurting workplace equality

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Carolyn Kaster / AP

First Lady Michelle Obama speaks to students about committing to education to create a better future on Nov. 11, 2013, at Bell Multicultural High School in Washington, D.C.

Michelle Cottle’s Politico story “Leaning out: How Michelle Obama became a feminist nightmare” predictably kicked the cyber–hornet’s nest. “Dear Michelle Cottle,” wrote Melissa Harris-Perry in an open letter on the MSNBC website over the weekend, “Are you serious?” “Shameful,” writer and Daily Show co-creator Lizz Winstead tweeted. Within hours, Cottle, a respected former New Republic staffer before moving to Politico, didn’t seem to have a girlfriend left on the Web.

But I think Cottle is on to something. I don’t mean that Obama doesn’t have a right to be Mom in Chief, First Child-Obesity Fighter, White House Christmas tree decorator any other darn thing she wants. Cottle’s critics are right on that one.

Still, her choice does throw a spotlight on the muddled goals of contemporary feminism. On the one hand, the No. 1 priority of official feminist groups is to eliminate the pay gap, smash the glass ceiling, and make sure that men share 50-50 of the housework and child care. On the other hand, as the response to Cottle’s provocation proves, it wants to end shaming and blaming and celebrate women’s freedom to do what they want. “Feminism allows women to take the role with which they choose and be proud of it and not harassed,” huffed one of the commenters about Cottle’s piece. “If Michelle is choosing this role then that is her right. How dare you find the audacity to criticize her?” Cottle’s argument “is the same judgey-wudgey bullshit that some feminists espouse which only serves to divide all women,” wrote Jessica Wakeman at the Frisky, the popular young-women’s-lifestyle site.

(MORE: First Lady Michelle Obama Takes Up a New Cause: Getting More Kids to College)

But women on both sides seem to ignore the fact that the pesky laws of mathematics make the two goals of workplace equality and women’s freedom of choice incompatible. Take the glass ceiling. Women graduate law school and become associates at the same rate as men. Go a step higher on the career ladder, however, and the ladies begin to disappear. By the time you get to the potential pool of partners, women are as rare as hummingbirds. At the top law firms, the sorts that attract people with credentials like Obama’s, women are only 19% of equity partners, according to the research group Catalyst. Similarly, women are only 26% of federal judges, 23% of state judges, 27% of law-school deans. At least part of the reason for the disappearing act is that many women are like the First Lady: they ease back on their ambitions for the sake of family life.

Women lawyers are hardly the only ones to say “no, thanks” to a chance to break the glass ceiling. According to research from McKinsey, women are 53% of new corporate hires. Yet they hold only 37% of middle-management positions, 28% of vice-president and senior-managerial roles, and 14% of seats on executive committees. The leaking pipeline, the report goes on, “helps explain why the number of women CEOs in Fortune 500 companies appears stuck at 2-3%.” Berkeley dean Mary Ann Mason has found similar attrition in the academic sciences: while 46% of young scientists started out expecting to become research professors, that was the case with only 11% of new mothers. Doctors are no different. Women doctors are far less likely to choose to go into demanding, high-paying specialties like surgery and cardiology; they are also less inclined to have their own practices. Only 13% of medical-school deans and department chairs are women.

(MORE: Tweets From ‘Feminist’ Taylor Swift)

Feminism confronts the same tension between equality and choice when it comes to the gender wage and wealth gap. Women are far more likely than men to opt out, reduce their hours or work part-time (the preference of the majority of women), which ensures the persistence of both a gender pay and wealth gap. One reason women earn less than men is that they work fewer hours. Just 45.1% of workers logging more than 35 hours a week are women. In fact, 25% of men working full-time jobs had workweeks of 41 or more hours, compared with 14% of female full-time workers. Men are also considerably more likely to be working over 40 and 50 hours.

Some activists like to blame all of this on America’s backwardness when it comes to family policies. That’s not what the evidence shows. Iceland, Sweden and Norway, the world’s most progressive countries, offer generous maternity leave, use-it-or-lose-it paternity leave, quality child care, and lots of cheerleading for engaged fathers. Yet women still work fewer hours — in less senior positions — and earn less than men. Michelle Obama is no exception. All over the world, women have shown by their choices that while they may want legal and moral equality, they’re still not going to behave exactly like men. And they’re surely not going organize their lives around the goal of abstract numerical parity.

And that may be the real feminist nightmare.

MORE: Obama Touts Fair-Pay Law at Historic Seneca Falls Site

13 comments
Swingdiva
Swingdiva

Okay, I get that women who choose to take time out to raise families are damaging their own careers.  But why should that be held against me?  I never had kids, never chose the mommy track -- so why, after 30+ years in the workforce, am I still underpaid compared to men in my profession?  Why have I gotten fewer promotions while getting more flak for knowing what I'm worth (and actually trying to negotiate raises)?  Because *other* women took a time-out??  Gee, thanks for nothing!  Maybe we still need that Equal Rights Amdendment after all.

GSand1804
GSand1804

No one who commented actually read this article. I just wish people would read the ENTIRE piece before putting in their "two (completely wrong and ignorant) cents" before making a comment.

LizzyKenn
LizzyKenn

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sistermoon50
sistermoon50

Where were these" feminists" when Michelle Obama was being viciously attacked by Rush Limbaugh? When her family was being compared to monkeys? Nowhere to be found, that's where. But when Newsweek published a less than flattering photo of Michele Bachmann, there was an uproar. White feminists have always had a patronizing, "Miss Ann" attitude toward black women. The unwarranted critcism of Michelle Obama is further proof.

BethAnneCarr
BethAnneCarr

This is an absolutely ridiculous argument when you are discussing the First Family of the United States. What is the family supposed to do? Abandon their children to hired help?

A President really must put the country first. Being President leaves a hole in his family -- he cannot be as active while he is running the country. It sounds as if he was a fairly active parent previously, but most likely cannot be as active. If Michelle Obama does not want to pull all her hair out trying to balance the needs of her children, what the country expects from a First Lady AND a job, she is wrong? No, she is taking care of her family at this hectic time in their lives. Her children only get one shot at childhood. I have a strong feeling the parents don't want them shortchanged.

firmsoil
firmsoil

Why only feminism, an ingrate 44 year old woman who publicly says "for the first time in my adult life I am proud of my country...", is generally not good.

zizii2
zizii2

So tell me exactly how much parity of pay and power did BLACK women get when they were breaking their backs on the cotton fields to accrue wealth for white slave owners? your piece here makes absolutely clear that you did not READ a single thing the critics of Michelle Cottle's misguided essay said! It is not Michelle Obama's job to fight for 1%er women's climb up corporate ladders. Her cause this year is to fight for those disadvantaged to even get their FOOT in the door to education. Priorities, dear, priorities.

 And by the way shouldn't your first concern be fighting Congress or whoever makes laws to PAY Michelle Obama for the unpaid duties she performs as First Lady? How about her rights to get PAID?  But you want her fighting for corporate women when neither you nor them have lifted a finger to defend her from incessant racist attacks from conservatives. Naw she ain't your "Mammy". She is focusing on HER OWN interests. Respect that

HillaryDarton
HillaryDarton

Michelle Cottle article wasn't worth the paper it was written on. Mrs. Michelle Obama has a right to do as she please. It s not her duty to try to please these feminists. It's Mrs. Obama right to put her family first if she choose too. I am so glad to see Michelle Cottle getting some push back over that article of hers. I saw Melissa Harris Perry and she told that Cottle woman off. Good, good, good.

Ahayes2009
Ahayes2009

leave this family alone all of u in the main stream media when will u take your torches and go the hell home?

Openminded1
Openminded1

@sistermoon50 Says another black who is biased. Michelle is a very intelligent, articulate woman, she is still a racist phony like her husband and a Muslim. That aside she is a good mom I ma sure, has good taste in clothes but still a con artist like her husband.

Openminded1
Openminded1

@BethAnneCarr She is most likely a good mom, she is still a phony and just talking pc because she has to in this world of pc BS. She is just like her husband a liar and racist. The same to parents before he became POTUS that went to and listened to a REV Wright calling whites Crackers and honkeys while the parish of blacks only laughed at his comments to include then senator Obama and his family.

Openminded1
Openminded1

@zizii2 How black are you ? she is a racist like Barry is. And this is 2013 and you most likely have never even seen a cotton field except in the movies. Whites put the Obamas in the White House moron, does not seem to racist to me.